I wrote about a mysterious VHS tape and a Total Slacker music video for VICE
I have this VHS tape labeled “Slap Happy” that was given to me by a friend who works as a porn actress. She doesn’t remember where it came from. The first hour of the tape is this weird old lady doing some kind of calisthenics routine for seniors around the edge of her bed. It involves a lot of clapping. There is no soundtrack and she does not talk at any point. I’m not sure whether it’s actually a workout video or performance art or what, but it is one of the most hypnotic and creepy things I’ve ever seen.
About a year ago I brought it over to Tucker’s house so we could watch it on the roof along with Nightmare on Elm Street 3 while drinking beer with our shirts off. At some point I got drunk and left without the tape, which gave Tucker the opportunity to steal its contents and make a music video for his band. The song is called “Life On Easy Street (uCouldDieInBedstuy)” and it’s about how life is pretty easy but the video kind of suggests that you could die in Bed-Stuy. I predict that if Tucker dies in Bed-Stuy it will be from falling off of his roof while making videos.
John Maus is a philosopher, professor, and musical composer who used to perform with Ariel Pink and Panda Bear. Nowadays he’s more or less exclusively a solo act. When he performs, Maus hits a button on his sequencer and launches into the most passionate, sweaty karaoke act you’ve ever seen, alternately jabbing his eye or his heart with the microphone while spit dribbles down his chin. My girlfriend loves John Maus. She says she loves John Maus because “he’s a mentally ill creep and hella hunky.” My girlfriend says I “should also note that he basically wears a uniform every day of his life: a button up shirt and New Balances. I’ve never seen him perform in anything else.” Here is my girlfriend’s hella hunky love at Market Hotel a few nights ago.
I put together a mixtape called I ONLY CAME HERE TO HANG OUT WITH YOU for FREE LOVE II, a collection of mixtapes curated by Impose Magazine in honor of Valentine’s Day. This mix and the accompanying original photograph should appeal to horny weirdos.
PLAYLIST
01 Molly Nilsson – Whiskey Sour
02 John Maus – Just Wait Til Next Year
03 Psychic TV – As Tears Go By
04 Gary Wilson – And Then I Kissed Your Lips
05 Brian Wilson – Mona
06 The Blue Rondos – Little Baby
07 Batter Recharger – Love Is Strange
08 The Moldy Peaches – MC Kracka’s Advice
09 Betty White – X Rated
10 Tonetta – 81 Inch Prime Ass
11 Ariel Pink – One More Time
12 R. Stevie Moore – I Wanna Hit You
Directed and edited by The Vidiot aka Matthew Caron
also featuring The Creepy Touch starring The Toilet Cobra aka Nick Gazin
Running Time: 180 minutes
Packaging and graphic design by Matthew Caron
DVD authoring by Jordan Fish
Kill With Video features a 90 minute megamix of the best episodes of my weekly web series for Mishka, reedited exclusively for this disc, with an additional three episodes included as bonus content.
As of this week, if you spend $100 at Mishka’s 350 Broadway storefront or online you’ll also be getting a FREE copy of the Kill With Video DVD, while supplies last.
From the opening salvo of“Pizza Krazy”to the hilarious “Pon De Rollins” and the triumphant “My Internet Girlfriend”this thing is a winner. Throw it on at a party, turn on your vaporizer, eat an 1/8 of mushroom, sit back and enjoy the high of your life! We guarantee you’ll be passing this DVD on to friends and showing it every chance you get.
But that’s not all! You’re also getting all 10 episodes of The Vidiot and Toilet Cobra’s (AKA Nick Gazin) The Creepy Touch, his funny and strange series of interviews with artists likeNobunnyto his calamitous and awkward interview withSuckers. His even scarier interaction with Big Apple Graphicsand of course his trip to the horror convention with his dear old dad.
They’re as good and awkward as you remember and they’re even better back to back. And if you’ve never seen a Creepy Touch? Get ready folks cuz U ’bout 2 get touched and you’re gunna like it!
